not depress lar

last day on the month of July.
first class- accounts (fav subject till today)~ teacher came in straight away told me that i couldn't come to the morning class coz its full. I was prepared for this outcome but i was abit pissed to find out all those people who told teacher that they have transportation problem got in the morning class while as me told the truth couldn't.

Was a bit dissapointed coz din get to watch 'war of the worlds' with friends .. they changed their mind and want to watch it on monday. So... i'll join them monday then.

after getting the msg from Nat, i smsed Andrew (Tawau close friend) to watch 'Batman Begins' with me. After all, i had a purpose ... i wanted to release stress.. so what ever movie don't matter/ who ever goes with me don't matter. Got a phone call in the cinema... didn't know who was that - number wasn't save in my phone.

suddenly, all this funny thoughts just poped up... such as ' did i do something wrong? who is finding me? did i offend anyone lately?' ... its as if i do not have any positive thoughts in my head anymore.

to my relieve...it was just a classmate.

Tomorrow, new month// new acc class// new attidude for me i guess ( i need it)!

WALAUWEH!

Wednesday, 29/6
good day-\ wonderful weather in the morning.
went to college with a big smile (after many people say i look dead, moody, tired and blur for the past few days).

oh yea, today was my accounting test. I think i did not bad ... only to get dissapointed with a bad news after it. I was moved to the afternoon accounting class~ Many reasons why i was bummed out by this news...
first--> Friends... will definitely miss the chatting time (mostly before class starts)...Yi Fang, Nat,
Dave... sad lar. Afternoon won't have any cool and fun people to hang around with! All of
them pretty much their own crew and gang.
second--> i like morning class... beats waking up late and go home 4.30~ damn tiring!

oh well... still not comfirm, i tried talking to the teacher.. she'll consider ( the probabilty is very low though).

after that... i took my ESl assesment. A question that we've done before.
more bad news to come...

i failed for my Applics evaluation exam. Wanted to release tension in Pyramid but had to go LAN class from 4.30 to 5.30.
so i killed time by going to extra econs class.. too free i guess. LOL

oh well... tomorrow plannin to watch movie with friends. at lease got something to look forward huh~

Disturbed

i had a pretty good day today..
having 2 test and the oral presentation behind my back and all..
had dinner at subang 15- some famous curry fish head restaurant.

funny, how one day can turn into a bad one easily~
nothing bad happen to me... its just that i receive a disturbing phone call... -that totally transform my mood into a more- unpleasant- one.

there is this girl, i really likED her// sms her a few times...
her BF actually called me to stop SMSing her... which i did--> (not smsing /disturbing her)
i felt abit confused whether it's the girl who didn't want me to bother her or the BF is over controlling... checking her hp without her knowing...

so i actually ignored her for quite some time...still unsure whether this particular girl didn't want me to be her friend or what not...
so just now i got a 'miss call' from her BF . I picked up the phone but no one responded...
i really hope he made an error phoning me...
If not~ i will ask him to see me personally. He ain't my BF... i respect him and stop bothering her GF... but if he is to ask me or tell me who to be and not to be friends with ...
he is way over the line... so..>> hope i can get over this petty shit over me!

RELIEVED

~ today was one stressful day.

started with Accounts open book test...
after that, went in to IS class thinking that the lecturer will give us his BS again- postponing the topical test. But i was 'surprised' he actually gave us the test today.
Next, ESL class... i had my oral presentation.

I presented a topic about ' spoiled child in our society today'- It was an oral presentation that require us to talk about what we dislike. So... yea.. i dislike brats that are not discipline at home (unlike me- strict discipline.. look at me today) lol! And also... i envy with how they can get what ever they want. hehe

3 things Done in one day! such a relieve... tomorrow i'll be having me ESL short story test. And the day after tomorrow will be Accounts test (closed book).. still busy..but non-the less~
better than what i've gone through yesterday. which was constant worry about how lazy i am not studying- and not doing anything about it.. hahaha~!

I am quite happy today also... because one of my friends told me that after i left the room for my IS topical test- teacher told them that i had full marks for the hardest question.. hehe!
and also, got good comments from friends with my oral presentation... SO.. KEEP the GOOD comments COMING~! haha

marvin from 'hitchicker's guide to the galaxy' 

load of stuff~

hm... haven't been blogging // busy with assesments and homework.
to sum up my week...

i passed my first IS topical test.
I presented for my book report in ESL and also an ESL assesment.
Ken (famiy friend/ a neighbour to me my whole life) is visiting, staying in my place.
Ken,my bro and I watched 'hitchickers guide to the galaxy' last night (good stuff if appreciated British Humour) after the farewell in CF.

today wasn't a pleasant day... a friend of mine got a shocking phone call- her friend has passed away because of an accident.
i feel sad for her...

How do you make a person in so much pain feel any better? comforting words and symphaty ain't enough..
i understand how that feels~ i too lost a friend before.

remembering approx 4 years ago, i lost a friend who had cancer ...
after many operations, i honestly thought that he would lived or recover from his sickness but i was wrong- i went to the funeral also.

he wasn't really close to me, knew him maybe less than 2 years... but his best friend is one of the closest person i knew in secondary school... so i know how hard it is to go through with times like this.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
tomorrow i'm planning to watch Initial D-
but next week a pretty busy week for me.
most probably will have 4 assesment in a row...
frustrated larr...
ai~

Happy Father's Day!

3 of us miss you dad~

here's a poem we want to share - (not created by us though... hehe)


You give to us everything we need.
You work hard everyday of the week.

You forgive us when we have done wrong.
You always remain courageous and strong.

You provide love and ask little in return.
we know from you, we can always learn.

we know often times we fall so short.
On this, you could write a long reports.

On Father’s Day we’d like to bless you.
we want you to know the honest truth.

we love you dearly, with all of our heart,
Even if we don’t show it to start.

I know we are not the perfect little angel.
But God has a reason, if you just look at the right angle.

You are our father and a great on at that.
we know you love us, even after a spat.

we hope you have a wonderful day.
we love you in the biggest way.

dad- happy father's day!

all down the drain

ever strive for something? ever try doing your best in achieving something? ever putting all your effort , strenght into something only to see it go down the drain/ screw up/ F*** up( u know what i mean)...

i have~

(morning- 7 a.m)
woke up- feeling confident as i was going to have my Applics evaluation exam at 9 a.m!
(afternoon 4 p.m)
came home from Sunway Pyramid - FEELING LIKE CRAP~ pissed, frustrated and sad in a way.

hm... something definitely happened in between 7 a.m till now huh~

no! Not because of the exam i am feeling shitTY- i didn't put THAT much effort into it.
i've been slacking lately.

everyone has their own favourite part of their own body. I too have that.
Mine has been the sideburn (hair).

my hair always been crew cut since form 2 (school rules), its only on holiday i get to style it up abit.
college-my effort paid off / my hair looks just right (after many times going to the saloon and modifying it - started from crew cut-)

today, after my stressful applics exam.... hang in pyramid . Cut my hair> spend RM35
suppose to be by a professional - pro my ass!!! he cut my freakin sideburn ! not only that, it is so bloody short!
damn pissed right now- coz I look like shit~

minor accident

if i said today was like any other day in college... i would be lying.
no doubt the morning was boring and i was feeling moddy as usual.

something happened to me in MORAL studies class (the last class)..
well, it was at Audi7... big lecture hall..
hm... i walked up// found me a good seat... and then my friend called me..
so i responded by goin up to her...
while walking, i fell.
NO... i didn't fall down while walking.... the floor or pavement just split open..
how to say, i din fell down... it was like half half> my leg couldn't feel anything, but my body still above the split open floor~

i was pretty calmed that time, - maybe abit embarrased ... thinking that i too heavy and made the floor crack!~ ...
i pulled myself up... looking at the hole i just created...
my gosh, i could have fell like 1-2 stories down!~ ... ( one of the highest seats in Audi 7)
i could have died!~ no lar... break a few bones here and there only..

lucky me... only then i realize i was that close of hurting myself...
friends around me was concerned and worried.. (don't know pretend or not)
and some also comforted me...
~ i don't care... i appreciate all of them anyways~ thx u guys (u know who u are)

yea... should buy a 4D or something... hiew!~

UPs And DOWN

sunday (june 12)

morning, Youth Service at Glad Tidings.
awsome worship,powerful message about claiming back birth rights.

after church , i was supposed to meet 2 old friends of mine- back from tawau//
well, 1 of them showed up..
the other one dissapoint me again... took me all the trouble just to got a conversation with her on the phone to set a date for this "meet up"...

memang dah biasa~ but.. ish! i was hopping i could see her, i really miss her... !

anyways... the 2 of us went to watch mr and mrs smith.
not a bad show.. such a kick ass show.. could have talked about the show for hours...
but after the show.. we ended up sharin our problems to each other.. haha

the short review is on my second blog.

tryin to revise for applics now..as my exam will be next week..~
end for now~

why ?

ESL class- a month back i think...
we discussed about religion,belief, God...
well...the respond from the class was pretty shocking for me... there was a number of free thinkers and those who does not believe there is a GOD that exist.

i remembered Mr Jay asking one of the student " why do you not believe there is a GOD? wouldn't it be better if you had something to believe, somewhere to go to if you have problems, or guide to live a more meaningful life?"

he answered: "well, if i have many problems and believed there was a GOD- WILL GOD COME DOWN TO EARTH and solve all my problems when i call HIM?...NO right?!!"... so i don't believe there is" ...

~ i was speechless... how do i answer this dude~ God don't work that way!

God is not SANTA!~... you have to serve him in order to be served.
and to believe there is a God, we need to know 1 thing..
we are all sinners- there is no turning back, what done is done. The only way to get back to the right track -Jesus (the choice that God have given us by sending his only son-Jesus down to earthand dying for our sins).


and today in Moral Class, we learned about religions - (how they are connected)

found out there are MORE who don't believe that there is a GOD..
i feel helpless in the class - as i kept thinkin of ways to answer them > why do I believe there is a GOD?< well, i feel his presence... he helps me in everyway (i surrender all to him)...

i was confused (not doubt), just how to answer these hard questions..
ask my dad... he said... there is 4 things to prove there is GOD...
1)creations
2)mirracle.. and the other 2 he forgotten... funny~
thats not the point...
i'm tired... end~ *for now

Sh.....F...DAm.... DIa....hai~

i decided to stop swearing- for real

cell leader -David manage to do it. why can't I?
good friend- Ee Ling claims she never sweared before... what's so hard then?

okey... you people can laugh all you want... i'm serius//
yes.... friends know its an impossible task for B.i.g to da v.i.c~ i will try my best.

yea--- today i got back my LAST applics test result...

before i got back the result..saw a few people crying because of their result...
i was there- thinking of everyway to cheer them up ( worrying whether they will take comfort from someone who didn't do as bas as them)...

oh boy~ was i PERASAN!?
i did worst than most of them- the whole class in fact...
thats how bad my result was...

i am such an idiot- ... now want to release stress...
but no swearing?!... how the Fff....(nvm)..
what other alternative do i have?!! ... evaluation exam is another 2 weeks...
need to be more hardworking...

-end-

being alone

mom and dad are not here now.
they went to Johor... Melaka i think- for their form 6 reunion.
pretty impressive for all of them to still keep contact after almost 30 years.

my brother followed.

my sis is celebrating her birthday with some friends... so...yea, i'm alone.

when i am alone... and not doing homework... (i did abit of assignment// thats it for me today)
i think... ALOT...
fantasize, day dream, remenise... and just simply Think.

well... everytime i think> there's surely someone will not be excluded from it.
and when this happen, i feel down. i feel so lonely (all of a sudden, because i am used to my own company)...

in Sunway, i have made plenty of good good friends.
some quite inspirational, some quite cool, some funny, some are really smart...
but i haven't met THE SPECIAL SOMEONE!
its hard~ havin to let go the -pass- special person...
not giving other people the chance...

don't know what the hell i'm crappin about now~ special someone!?~~
its not vice versa... i am noone's special someone.. sad huh~

pieces of me are still in her... "she completes me"... lol... (like i said- impossible if i'm noone's special somebody.. )

GOD YOU ARE FAR AWAY!~ WHERE ARE YOU?! bring me back... I NEED YOU ~
this is my cry

---end----

birthday and too much relaxing

my sis' birthday is today. (4th of june)

but we celebrated it last night.
in a japanese restaurant called ZEN..
hmmph... high class, good service, nice food, price not so nice...
but... i really enjoyed ' the experience' of eating raw fish with wasabi~
ITS WASABI~ i don't eat hot stuff like that!!!

thats the difference when mom and dad are around...
i don't even eat fish here... so bloody expensive..~
and pretty sick of eating it lar... i'm from tawau (cheapest sea food ever)

my sis ordered a 'chocolate banana' cake from secret recipe.
Mmmm.... ~ yummy!

this week has been great!~ though i still have assignments, test.. exam another 2 weeks from now.. haha~

yea... i watched madagascar- review (not really, just how i spent my day in pyramid before my sis birthday celebration )

bah~ tired with a capital T

i've been pretty busy or tensed up because of the assignments and test that won't stop coming.
well, yesterday (2nd june tues)... was one of the most busy day i ever faced.
wake up early- go school so i can prepare for my IS test on 10.30
studied in library for applics test on 4.30 (that didn't went well at all)
5-7 had sunway uni Christian Fellowship (today was about temptation)

got a call from friend to watch movie at 8.
i went (to release stress)....
movie picked~ HOUSE OF WAX
(ratings will be next)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
now pretty burned out...
i have accounts homework...
not planning to do it. i am pretty pissed because 2 days ago i had to go to college just to borrow accounts text book to finish the accounts homework... went to class the next morning..
many students who didn't finish or even start the homework... and the excuse they gave are just so stupid.

frustrated~... i won't be bothered to finish it now!

house of wax review

i give it a 1/10

worst movie of 2005...

links - full review (well, just how i like to slam it)

wrong timing.

i haven't been blogging for dayz...
thats because i've been busy with work ..
tomorrow is my applics test and information system test, so now it's not the perfect time to blog..
but i had a long - 1/2 week..

just that day, i walked pass the girl-(whom her bf warned me not to sms her EVER again)..
i tried my best to avoid her eversince, not knowing whether she was the one who didn't want me to disturb her or her bf was just over pocessive / too controlling.

so anyways, i walked pass by her... she saw me and reacted by not wanting to look at me.
this was the first time i saw her avoiding me instead of the other way round.

hmm... something is goin on here...
i am thinking... is she feeling guilty because she did this to me~
or she is embarassed because her bf did something like that...
so confused now...
but this don't really matter now... i am busy till the point where this petty things can't bother me
... anyhow>> college life (in module B) has been better than i expected...
well...its going pretty smooth to say the least.

my mom and dad is here to spend the holidays with us...
gained weight because of the superior treatment gave by my parents... lol
my dad just bought a car for my bro...yea... so good news!